Funny Observations

531. I’m Not Coming to the Party, but I Still Want to be Invited

See also Party.

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Funny Things

532. Helicopter Ejector Seats

See also Useless.

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Funny Advice

533. When Using a Public Bathroom, Always Check to See if There’s Toilet Paper

Otherwise, you might walk out with one sock. See also Bathroom.

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Funny Sayings

534. You Bet Your Bottom Dollar!

See also Old-Timey.

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Funny Euphemisms

535. Food Trident

Also known as a fork. See also Cutlery.

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Funny Advice

536. If Someone Insults You, Say “Exactly” and Confuse Them

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Funny Euphemisms

537. Screaming Hamster Back From the Dead and it Poops On Your Eye

Sorry, I meant a sixth grader playing the kantele.

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Funny Jobs

538. Guardian of the King’s Anus

This was found on somebody’s sarcophagus from ancient Egypt. You think you got it bad? This guy spent his whole life looking after a single bumhole. See also Scatological.

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Funny Foods

539. Despairagus

A very sad vegetable. See also Made Up.

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Funny Things to Do

540. Slipping on a Banana Peel

It’s a classic. See also Old-Timey.

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