Funny Sayings

1. “My Bad” and “Sorry” Mean the Same Thing Unless You’re at a Funeral

See also Death.

Added by a Guest on March 27, 2026| 1 Comment | 17 people like this You Like This | Unlike

Funny Sayings

2. I Like to Put My Oranges in the Refrigerator, then Close the Door and Open It Back Up Again to Play a Sad, Sadistic Version of Peek-a-Boo

A saying some friends and I used back in school when fooling around with Google Translate.

Added by RustyMew on March 13, 2026| 3 Comments | 7 people like this You Like This | Unlike

Funny Sayings

3. A thief broke into my house and stole all my lamps. I should be angry, but I am de-lighted.

See also Dad Jokes.

Added by a Guest on February 14, 2026| 1 Comment | 18 people like this You Like This | Unlike

Funny Sayings

4. If you run in front of a car you get tired. If you run behind a car you get exhausted.

Dad jokes to tell you dad. See also Dad Jokes.

Added by a Guest on February 9, 2026| 1 Comment | 21 people like this You Like This | Unlike

Funny Sayings

5. You Have to Hand It to Short People, Because They Can’t Reach It

Added by a Guest on November 21, 2025| 5 Comments | 24 people like this You Like This | Unlike

Funny Sayings

6. In Terms of Money, We Have No Money

See also Money.

Added by a Guest on October 15, 2025| 3 Comments | 14 people like this You Like This | Unlike

Funny Sayings

7. I’m Not Procrastinating, I’m Doing Side Quests

See also Video Games.

Added by a Guest on September 29, 2025| 8 Comments | 54 people like this You Like This | Unlike

Funny Sayings

8. The Naked Man Fears No Pickpocket

See also Crime, Nudity.

Added by a Guest on September 27, 2025| 6 Comments | 55 people like this You Like This | Unlike

Funny Sayings

9. The Older I Get, the More I Understand Why Roosters Start Their Day Screaming

Added by a Guest on September 18, 2025| 1 Comment | 58 people like this You Like This | Unlike

Funny Sayings

10. At the End of the Day… It’s Night

Added by a Guest on September 10, 2025| 9 Comments | 68 people like this You Like This | Unlike